by Dell C. “D. C.” Toedt III
on 2008-04-16
Monster Cables, which makes extremely high-priced stereo cables, has apparently sent a cease-and-desist letter to Blue Jeans Cable, alleging various kinds of infringement. Bad move – the president of Blue Jeans Cable, Kurt Denke, is a former litigator who responded pretty forcefully:
… Once I have received the above materials and explanations from you, I will undertake to analyze this information and let you know whether we are willing to accede to any of the demands made in your letter. If my analysis shows that there is any reasonable likelihood that we have infringed in any way any of Monster Cable’s intellectual property rights, we will of course take any and all action necessary to resolve the situation. If I do not hear from you within the next fourteen days, or if I do hear from you but do not receive all of the information requested above, I will assume that you have abandoned these claims and closed your file.
As for your requests for information, or for action, directed to me: I would remind you that it is you, not I, who are making claims; and it is you, not I, who must substantiate those claims. You have not done so.
I have seen Monster Cable take untenable IP positions in various d
23 Comments
biglyburrito
The complete story: https://www.bluejeanscable.com/legal/mcp/index.htm
schumpeter
You have to wonder what it is with companies having “monster” in their names that makes them such monsters.
This story reminded me of the multi-year battle by Monster energy going after MonsterFishKeepers.com
https://reefbuilders.com/2016/03/01/monster-fish-keepers-win…
stego-tech
It was this story that clued me into BJC as an entity in the first place. Gladly shelled out a couple hundred bucks for solidly-built custom speaker interconnects a few years later with them, and have zero regrets.
As far as legal tactics go, I’m very sympathetic to his position and wish more folks would fight to the finish instead of settling for nuisance values.
ocdtrekkie
So I clicked the first link to read about the actual claim, and I was floored by the author bio at the bottom: "Clint Deboer was terminated from Audioholics for misconduct on April 4th, 2014. He no longer represents Audioholics in any fashion."
Gotta wonder how bad you gotta screw up to have your byline on every article you wrote permanently set to that.
bschmidt700
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bschmidt702
[flagged]
RustyRussell
OK, the whole "I am a lawyer" was next-levelled by this closing sentence: "Not only am I unintimidated by litigation; I sometimes rather miss it."
walrus01
Previously, monster cable vs. using a coat hanger for a speaker wire.
https://www.google.com/search?client=firefox-b-e&channel=ent…
chrisweekly
All bullies are cowards.
kazinator
I'm thinking, what are the odds that the president of some boutique audio cable company would be a litigator.
tqi
Monster Cables is a name I hadn't thought about in ages… I mostly remember them as the company that tried to convince people that digital images would look better via a more expensive cable.
CalChris
Reminds me of when Caterpillar (trucks+tractors) sued Cat and Cloud Coffee (coffee) in Santa Cruz for trademark infringement.
https://www.ksbw.com/article/cat-and-cloud-coffee-in-santa-c…
bschmidt812
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npunt
In my head canon Monster Cables pivoted to become Monster Energy and justified it to shareholders as 'we're still in the business of getting people wired'
jaredandrews
I had no idea Monster sold anything other than over priced guitar cables… About 15 yeard ago, I knew a guy who exclusively bought Monster… well he had two of them, one from the guitar to the pedal board and another from the board to the amp.
But it wasn't because of their alleged improved sound quality or whatever, it was because they had a lifetime warranty. Dude had bought two monster 1/4inch cables and gotten them replaced "for free" like 5 times.
From what I can tell they got rid of the lifetime warranty around 2018 and have mostly transitioned to licensing their name.
ghshephard
I read the letter and it looked like pretty much the first negotiating position of any lawyer. Regardless of what you think, convince the opposition that you are prepared to litigate to the end of time.
bschmidt906
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m463
I remember buying audio gear (think receiver, amplifier, cd player) and being the focus of the upsell for 2-5x more expensive monster cables.
Once I patiently explained that a cable shouldn't matter for digital as long as the bits got there, and seeing the young sales guy pause and then "get it". And I got the (relatively) cheap cables.
Also speaker wire. You can get perfectly good copper cables for less, probably in a thicker gauge wire.
bschmidt986
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hagen_dogs
grok copypasta:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about my intellectual property, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at the University of Pennsylvania Law School in 1985, and I’ve been involved in numerous federal litigations over 19 years, with a focus on large damages and complex issues. I am trained in courtroom warfare, and I’m one of the top attorneys in dismantling meritless claims. Your accusations are nothing to me but just another frivolous threat. I will shred your case with precision the likes of which has never been seen in a court of law, mark my fucking words.
You think you can get away with sending me this hit-and-run demand letter over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak, I am compiling my legal defenses and gathering evidence to expose the gaping holes in your so-called claims, so you better prepare for the legal storm, sir. It’s the storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your lawsuit. Your case is fucking dead. I can counter your arguments anywhere, anytime—in depositions, motions, or trial—and I can dismantle your position in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare legal expertise.
Not only am I extensively trained in litigation, but I have access to a vast network of legal resources and experts, honed over a quarter-century of practice. I will deploy the full force of the law to defend my rights and bury your baseless allegations. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little ‘clever’ cease-and-desist was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking pen. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will unleash a fury of merits-driven arguments all over you, and you will drown in them. Your case is fucking dead, sir.
I am uncompromising—literally. I spent my first seven years in defense practice, watching insurance carriers cave to nuisance settlements, and it pissed me off. As a plaintiff’s advocate, I took cases to judgment even when fat settlement checks were on the table. I’d rather spend fifty thousand dollars fighting your bullying ass in court than give you a single cent of unmerited settlement funds. You think you can intimidate me with your Monster Cable modus operandi—threaten, negotiate, license, repeat? Think again. There are only two ways you’re getting anything out of me: (1) convince me I’ve infringed with actual evidence, or (2) get a final judgment from a court. Good luck with that. If you sue me, I’ll drag this to judgment, holding the court’s attention on the utter lack of merit in your claims from start to finish. Not only am I unintimidated by litigation—I fucking miss it sometimes.
acobster
Perhaps the coolest way I've ever seen someone say "I'd love to see you try."
dkh
I want to be this man when I grow up
noduerme
>> developed an intense frustration with insurance carriers who would settle meritless claims for nuisance value when the better long-term view would have been to fight against vexatious litigation as a matter of principle
I got let out of 2-3 months of jury duty on an asbestos case by saying basically the same thing. Voir dire is fun, particularly if you manage to scare the bejezus out of both sides.